Take it back
Category: Emotions, Relations
Why must you close your heart?
Why can’t you forgive?
I wish you’d talk it out.
I wish you wouldn’t just let it go.
—
I realize that you need someone to talk to.
I realize you need to get it off your chest.
But I wonder if you realize how this will scar.
—
I hate that you gave me this memory.
I want you to take it back.
A self reflection
Category: Emotions, Ramblings
Is it just me, or have we been made to download new versions/updates to Wordpress lately? I just finished the task on AExA not more than twenty minutes ago. I’ll scream if there’s another update to it soon.
Anyway. I think I’ve found most of everything to preoccupy myself over the past two months or so: dramas, photography, mangas, books, movies, scrapbooking, flower pressing, origami, and very recently - exploring the art of papermaking. It’s amazing, I think, how easily I was able to move from one interest to the other. Explore, divulge, immerse, create - that was my mantra for the past few months. I have seen, read, learnt and did everything I could get my hands on.
It was liberating.
I mastered the art of avoidance; it’s a shame that reality eventually catches up though. Or else I’d find the next thing to occupy my mind with.
Edited, many times.
Shitty month
Category: Emotions, Ramblings
Just when you think it couldn’t get worse, it does. I can even list out the things that have gone bad, but I refuse to show more angst than I normally do, least someone thinks I’m emo.
… That was just an excuse, by the way. I’d rather not share, because then I’d have to attempt to be cryptic because I’m just that kind of person. They say ignorance is bliss, right? Well it’s only after you perfect it. The in-betweens are almost tortuous.
The visit, isn’t going as bad as I thought it would. There could be better days but that’s just life. As for what I was/am doing wrong, I haven’t been very successful considering how I gave in twice since the post was made. In retrospect, it’s probably not all that bad; old habits are hard to break and I think these things take time to get used to, to let go. Especially if it’s a very old habit.
The kittens have been growing up, obviously. They’re a little over a month old, can you believe it? I have tons of photos I want to share. Thankfully, Flickr Uploadr makes it easier to do so. Their eyes are changing color now, from blue to maybe orange, I think. I was hoping green, but… who knows. At the moment, it’s still at the transforming phase. Which looks beautiful.
What else? I don’t know, I guess this is just one of those fill-in posts.
Does this sound odd?
Category: Emotions, Rants
Consider this situation between two people/friends:
Boy: I love you
Girl: …
Boy: I love you
Boy: and it drives me crazy
Girl: *speechless*
Boy: I don’t even know why I love you
Boy: I don’t even know if it’s love
Girl: *thoroughly confused now*
Let’s disregard whether or not the girl likes him back. And look at it from an outsider’s perspective.
Isn’t a bit disappointing and even a bit insulting to have a boy claim that he loves you and yet cannot state a reason why? Isn’t it odd, or is it just me? I’m not saying he should always have a reason, but wouldn’t it further add to the romance of the situation if he said something like “because you’re you” or something equally cliched and disgustingly lovey-dovey?
But then he’d be lying if he didn’t mean it.
Of course, there’s the way it was said too. As if there couldn’t have been a reason for him falling in love with you, like you were deficient in something. Or as if he was settling for less. If he loves her, shouldn’t he be able to at least give a reason why?
Now if that doesn’t throw the romance out of the declaration, I don’t know what does.
… Or am I taking it too far?